Psychic Night

I've spent the night in mental silence, just enjoying the quiet stillness that only night can bring. As I closed my eyes, not against the darkness, never against it, just for a brief respite from the exhaustion that still plagues me, I wondered at the phantoms that dance in the shadows. These phantoms will vanish in a cloud of obscurity given time, and newer ones will take their place. It is a never-ending cycle, and an intricate dance that both fascinates and scares me. I drifted in and out of sleep, content to let my mind wander unfocused. Words from my past, whispers of the future threaded their way through my mind and heart, both open and unguarded today. Both friends and kin have commented that I'm always guarded and mysterious. They have yet to see me at night, when the darkness makes all defenses useless. Or perhaps, it offers its own brand of protection. I revel in the veil of shadows, in the hidden secrets of the night. The timeless dance of night and day holds valuable lessons for those who choose to look. *thoughtful* As I reach the hour of dawn, when night blends into day and darkness recedes for the moment, I wonder if...under the same blanket of stars, he too wonders at the passage of time. We've all grown. Yet somehow, I feel frozen in place. Everyone has moved, and destiny moves with them, altering strands of fate when necessary. I feel like something is just a breath away, just out of my grasp. It's the same feeling you get when you stand on a cliff. That breathless feeling, that sensation that the next big break is around the next corner. I've done my fair share of evolution. Will it be enough? The silence of night does nothing to dispel my illusions. Perhaps that is why I'm a creature of eternal night. As people around me slumber, I am content to allow my mind to weave illusions of an ideal world. I sense even Phoebe is growing frustrated with my idealistic views. The feeling of detachment ebbs and flows. But like the ocean surf, it is still everpresent. I can observe the world spin on its axis, but somehow...I don't feel a connection to the world I live in. The panic that people feel as deadlines loom is lost on me. The stress and pressure they feel is alien to me. And after so long, many thoughts later, I arrive in the same place I was at years ago. *tilts head* I still feel detached. I could wander through the hallways of time, visit each different era, but I sense that in any time, people like me do not belong to society in the conventional ways. We are far too different. That I am different from my friends and family I have no doubt. It has been proven time and time again. There are two kinds of people in situations like this. Those who shun what they deem different out of fear, and those who stay out of curiosity. *tilts head* I believe I owe Phoebe an explanation. So here it is, plain and simple. I feared hospitals because I could sense the pain of patients there and scent death in those places. While that fear no longer has power over me, I will not step into another hospital as long as I live. I still dislike it when people touch my veins. It sends shivers up my spine. *thoughtful* Night is fading fast as the sun peeks over the horizon. I believe it is time for me to fade away as well.
Michael, your name has been resounding in my heart.