Wanderings Of A Philosophical Wonderer

Gay, philosophical, poetic, dark, light. ME.

Saturday, August 19, 2006

Psychic Duet

We're like one person split into two bodies. I know how you feel, I know what you're thinking. I know how you feel about me. But I can't bring myself to commit. Azy, if you're reading this...I'm terribly afraid. I've danced in and out of relationships, had my heart smashed more times than I care to count, I've toyed with feelings of both boys and men alike. Smashed lots of hearts in my own right too. But in this instance, I cannot bring myself to say it. I am not afraid for me. But I'm afraid for your friend. For our friend. We've known each other for a long time. Three years? Yes? But I cannot. I simply can't. I can't believe that she's liked me for so long. It's not that I don't understand. Love is enduring. But I don't want her to rush into things. I know you're protective of her. But so am I. She's my friend too. I don't want to agree to this relationship only to have a stable friendship torn asunder when things break down. Things are moving way too fast. But how do I slow things down without hurting her feelings? I'm no greenhorn when it comes to guys. I know how and when to apply pressure without cracking their psyche. I know when to release, and I know what I can and cannot do. But this is different. I can't just waltz in and out and expect hearts to remain whole and unbroken. AZY! Tell me what to do...I have no idea how to handle this. This is foreign territory to me. A whole new dance, and I don't quite know the steps.

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