Psychic Love

What has been broken can be fixed. Can it? I still recall vividly...that night, when the evening mists rolled around us, and you left for what I'm afraid is the last time. You looked at me with such sadness, but you only saw the coldness of the illusion I wove tightly around myself. You didn't see that my heart was breaking after our two year hello and goodbye. I saw the edges blur as the engine revved up, and then you were only a speck in the distance. Only then did I allow the tears and sadness to touch my face. How can we say that nothing is left, after the bond that was created out of pure love still remains? Not many will understand, and more will mock me for still tending to an ageless fire long forgotten. I do not forsake the one I love, even when he believes himself to be beyond redemption. But I do understand that healing has to come from within, before salvation can set in. I do not care, these words that pour from my heart reverberate with truth. Do you remember that word? Reverberate? I teased you about it, the exact day when our lives took an unexpected turn. You found me in tears that night, and you offered me your hand. In return, I gave you my heart. The days and months that followed were filled with golden sunlight, interspersed with terrible storms in which I was sure I would lose you forever. Even when anger seized us, you'd vow, "I will never leave you." It is the curse of being who I am. Vehemently resistant to change as I am, it is inevitable that people will leave me. The lost boys left Peter. You cried, and I wept inside for each tear you shed, each shard that scarred my heart. I remember when you found out the depth of love I bear for you. It was late afternoon, and the sun was dying, surrendering his throne to his lunar queen. I tried not to cry, but I didn't want you to know that I had the audacity to love you. It was laughable. A demon in love with a mortal angel. You gently lifted my chin with a finger, and whispered the words that still haunt me to this day. "Love is not something you should be afraid of." I melted, and the tears that I cried were enough to flood the Sahara. I have kept every memory alive, in this garden that once held two. I knew that when I met you, and touched your heart, you would be destined for great things. That calling would lead you away from me, away from the darkness where I reign supreme. I tried to make our parting as bitter as possible, I wanted you to leave hating me. You know what they say about wishes and carefulness. You did leave bitter and disillusioned. For two years, I worried what would become of you. And when I finally saw...the air left my lungs. You have grown into your own. Heartbreaker. I say that with affection. I was immensely relieved that the years had not made you unrecognisable. I saw you from a mile away, recognised that chiseled profile, regardless of the minor changes the others kept marveling over. I remembered that musical laugh, the mischief that shone in such soulful eyes. I permitted myself a glance, no more. Remembered how those hands had cradled me in my worst moments, remembered the tears that frosted those eyelashes when you saw the full extent of my anguish. You were like a flower finally in bloom, and I was too afraid to come near, lest the scent drove me mad. That is why I kept my distance. You have finally grown to be who you were. I'm still figuring out who I will be. The sea breeze stung my eyes, that's why they kept filling up. The air was cool, but I was warmed...because I know at last you will survive. You don't need me, you never did. I wonder if I can say the same for myself. This...emotion, I have heard tell of it. Musicians sing praises of it, artists attempt to capture it on canvas, and angels guard it scrupulously. It is called love, and you taught me what it means. Can I fix what I have broken? Please say yes.
Gabriel, if love is cherished so, why are we condemned for loving?